indecisions

I love him and I hate him. I hate the way he has control over my emotions, that he makes me want to serve him and to cook for him, shop with him and to save money for him. I hate that i want to please him.

I hate that I am not going to activities and church meetings on fridays and am getting obsessed about him.

I hate that I need reassurance and confirmation from him.

I like listening to npr and have not had time to do so in so long. I haven't read in so long.

I need to read more news, spend more time with friends, have better self control and watch more debate videos online.

I need to be more serious about my faith.